Am I working toward goals?
Am I where I want to be in life? In health? In my relationships?
Am I stuck?
Today is Ash Wednesday. For the billions of Christians worldwide, Ash Wednesday marks the start of Lent, a six-week period of reflection and penance. You don’t have to be Christian, religious, or spiritual to take a moment for self-reflection. It’s mid-March, which means the New Year’s resolutions have waned. Why is that? Chances are it is because the resolution didn’t align with your “why.”
I’m giving you the secret sauce to successful coaching. The secret sauce is that unless a client can figure out the answer to their “why” question, they will struggle to achieve their goals. Want to lose weight? Why. Want to exercise more? Why. We all need to take time to identify why our goals are important.
I’ll use myself as an example. I am a perfectionist. I do loads of research before each blog post because I want to make sure that what I’m sharing with you is factual, valid, actionable and heck, maybe even interesting. Here’s the thing. I could write the perfect post for the perfect audience and if you aren’t in a place where you feel like that information fits your “why,” then it doesn’t matter. All the information in the world isn’t going to influence change. Change begins when we examine our narrative and decide whether we are moving toward what we want or are we stuck.
I want my blog to grow. I want it to reach more people because I believe when you are ready to hear the message, this information will help you revolutionize your health. First, you need to be in a place where you can receive the message and act on it. For me, this means I need to get out of my own way and be riskier. Some posts will flop. Some will resonate. But I won’t know if I’m spinning my wheels trying not to make a mistake. It sounds silly, but it’s something scary for me. Okay enough about me…
Let’s indulge in a scenario.
Me: Hey guys, I’m giving in. I’m tired of meal planning and cooking every day, fasting every day, exercising every day. I’m over it.
You: First, I did not see that one coming. Second, you post every week about the number of health benefits of fasting and trying these foods like broccoli sprouts. You must believe it to be true.
Me: I don’t know anyone else who does all these things, why should I?
You: I understand it’s hard. But it’s like you said, you have two young kids and it’s a good example for them and for your community.
This scenario is intended to show how you can help to change the narrative by allowing someone to make the counter argument for their own behaviors. Hearing yourself articulate the reasons for (or against) a specific behavior can be a powerful influencer to help you understand your big “why.”
A great example of this scenario is in an article in Forbes interview Behavior Scientists, David Maxfield and Joseph Grenny. Check it out HERE.
I want to give you some space in your day to examine your narrative. Ask yourself these questions today.
What do I truly want for myself?
What is my WHY? (Why is change important to me)
If things worked out the way I envisioned, what would be different?
Here’s the bottom line. Whatever you are doing right now is exactly what it takes to get you to where you are.
I believe that you have all the tools you need to achieve your goals. Sometimes it takes a coach, a counselor, a therapist, a specialist to help you identify and use these tools, but I believe in you, that’s why I started this blog. That is why I’ll force myself out of my comfort zone. That is why I won’t stop.
“All personal breakthroughs begin with a change in beliefs.”Tony Robbins
Ready to figure out your WHY together? Get started here.